True Love

PIC_0085

Love is nothing other than finding the truth. ~Rumi

(I am choosing to take two paths to understand the line, the first is about seeing the truth being painful, second will be truth being bliss!, so two posts on this!)

We are ridden by the present world, where to keep love – we have to cover up. We have to keep ourselves from what we like just to survive the love we know of. Deceit is the new name for love, anger its companion, cheat its accomplice. We hanker to find the new solace, knowing well that even if that was the truth, we have to hide it to keep what we have going. We individually have lost the sense and love to accept nature, accept what we know as truth and transcend our love beyond that. It has also become the norm that we do not want to know the truth, as to accept the truth we have to go beyond being possessive. Possessiveness is the root killer of true love. The more we hold on to what we love, the more we suffocate and the more we want to mask the truth. The classic case of deceit happens only when we hold on to the ones we love beyond what that love can even bear. Truth many times hurts, hurts bad. Like we spoke earlier finding the truth is also a great way to let our ego die sooner. How many of us can take that truth and move our love beyond?

Growing our love even after realising truth might hurt is real unconditional love.

Someone had said earlier, “If you really love something, let it go. If it comes back to you – it truly belonged to you, else not”. When we see our loved one liking someone or something else more than they do to us, we cannot accept it. We want to hold on tightly to that person, so that they won’t leave us. We grow more and more possessive and become ridden with suspicion. We cannot bear the thought of that person leaving us because the truth is that we are insecure. We are scared of loneliness, being left out and dumped. That is more forceful than the actual love we share for that person. On the other hand if we help that person explore their freedom, be unconditional and still share your feelings – no matter whether that person chooses to stay with you or leave – your love does not die. You end up growing your love. Knowing the true love is all about letting go, accept what comes as real even if its not pleasant and love unconditionally. It is a great feeling!

Hurts turn to blessing

Diyas for diwali

What hurts you, blesses you. Darkness is your candle ~ Rumi

What hurts you? have you sat down and thought what are the list of things that really hurts you? When we sit and think through most of the things that hurt us, we realise that everything is related to our ego. Whatever can hurt us can only touch the ego which covers us. We get hurt by words, thoughts, actions, negativity, feelings and much more – all of which can only touch our ego. Whenever our ego gets touched, it is where anger originates. We have blended so much with our ego, that we are no longer able to see us different from the ego. We feel as if we have gotten really hurt whereas only our ego was touched. If we are able to see us different from the ego and sense that ego is just a cover to our true self, what can really hurt us? Our pure self is really beneath our false ego, and we must realise that our true self can never be touched by anything that only hurts our ego.

Remove the ego, everything you then receive is just a blessing.

When we truly realise that only ego is getting affected, what a true liberation it would be if we in turn want to get the ego to be affected, battered and ego get hurt, so that it leaves us? it gets killed? that is liberating. If you see any hurt then you will start to welcome it, knowing very well it is going to help kill the ego. The more ego gets battered, the more it would distance itself from you, the true self. In that nature of hurt lies a great blessing which you must learn to welcome. The minute we are able to distance ourself from our ego, bliss originates. Anger has no place, as anger is only connected to the ego. When ego goes, so does your anger. It has no residence in you. The more purer you get, the more bliss you are in. In that sense, darkness of letting your ego go, is definitely your candle. That candle then illuminates your self, which would then light everything around you. Lets hanker for that true light to emanate from us.

Loud Silence

PIC_0019_2

I closed my mouth and spoke to you in a hundred silent ways. ~ Rumi

I remember reading another book which said this differently – “A human being is the only creature who can feel all alone in a crowd and crowded when all alone”. We know it, how much ever we try to be alone, we are generally never alone. Thoughts about past and future never let us to be alone. Especially thoughts about the past are our worst enemies. They can be both good or bad thoughts. They never do good to us. They either make you cringe, upset or remorseful about a bad past – or be extremely happy about something which has already passed. You can uplift yourself from the present bad moment you might be having, but that can only be a temporary solution. There are a number of thoughts about “Living in the now” or the present – it becomes harder to practice. But, what has this got to do with speaking in silence?

The more you are aware of the present, the more you can hear in silence.

When your mind is crowded about the past, or contemplating the future – your ears and mind are closed to the messages you receive from the loved ones. You are pre-occupied with thoughts which are not going to help the present. The minute you quiet yourself – be aware and sit silent, you will hear a thousand messages which are meant for that moment from the ones you care about. We as human beings are always hankering for the clear and loud indications, forgetting the instincts, subtle messages that are sent to us. There are a million souls willing to help us and send constant messages to us – only when we sit in silence, be one with ourselves – then we can hear the silent messages. There is answer to every moment of your life – there are energies which guide you, guard you and lead you to the right path. How do we practice to listen to those messages in silence. God also speaks only in silence, never when you are crowded.

Your question has the answer

 

IMG_0391

Look for the answer inside your question ~ Rumi

When we have a question, we want the answer. We have become impatient. Impatience is the new way of life. Everything circles around instantaneous gratification. This goes to the mind and the questions we have. How have we lost the patience to even think about the question. As children we tend to be impatient, just generating a lot of questions and we want the answers to it. We do not even have the patience to digest the answers to the questions asked. As a child, what is interesting is that when someone answers to one question, the mind is so fresh it grasps the answer, understands it fully and jumps to the next question. The key is to keep the mind fresh to receive and grasp the answer. As we grow up, we are already clouded with perceptions, known answers and pre-thought answers. How would we be able to receive those new answers? But do we really need to ask so many questions?

If you know the question, believe that you also know the answer.

Every question comes from the basic quest to know more. If there are answers in the question itself, we have to prepare us to first go deeper into ourselves. Only when we understand the need for that question, we shall be able to find the answer. It is not the question which will give us the answer, it is the mind which brings up the question which also has the answer. If we go deeper and ask “why is this question coming to me now?”, we will know the answer to that question. If all answers are within us, how do we grow intellectually? – this is not about growing intellectually, it is about growing internally. It is about the trust which you can place on yourself. If you stop questioning yourself, you will already know it. The universe always conspires to send you the answer. It is about being patient and open to receive the answer. If you know the question, believe that you also know the answer. Be patient, take a walk, sit in stillness, be aware – the answer is around you.

Disappear, Lose yourself, become invisible

2012-11-02 10.36.24

How is it with this love, I see your world and not you? ~Rumi

How do we see one’s world without that person? This is about living the other person’s life as that person does – and when you see that world as yours, when you completely own it beyond just being part of it – amazingly the other person does not exist in the form you earlier thought. That world which belongs to the other person which truly belongs to both of you – seamlessly blends that person. What you see as a wish, a thought, an action, the drama all are nothing but a manifestation of what the other person sees and thinks about. You see that person in everything, every small thing – you tend to not see the person as a person but a manifestation.

When you see the world through the life of another, you also lose yourself eventually.

Love in the purest form is nothing but a union of two individual being’s thoughts as one. Love is about accepting the other person as they are and at the same time – losing your ego to accept their world. True love in many ways unconditional. when you do have specific conditions to be loved or to be in love, you have not yet merged the two worlds. There is always expectations about how you want to see that world. The minute you lose yourself, disappear and become invisible in the bliss of that union of two souls, thoughts become one – worlds manifest as one, acceptance becomes the norm, there is no giving in as you are always ready to receive anything, there is just that world which belongs to the two souls – without even the two people as they are already in every single atom of that connected space.

A face to fit everyone

IMG_0102

To fit inside everyone’s heart , I put on a new face everyday.~Rumi

This pretty much sums up our modern life. We all now have a deep desire to satisfy everyone around us. We want to appear as the do-gooder to even an unknown person. It could be someone whom we just met, or someone with whom we know a possibility of meeting does not exist. Still, we go that very long extra mile to be in that person’s heart.

Here is the thin line.

A need to fit into everyone’s heart is very different from being neutral. 

As we endeavour to be in the good books of everyone, be the nicest person they know of or simply exude the demeanour of a humble person – makes you skew towards one thought or the other. You have to change your ways and means to suit to someone’s expectation. In return, what you end up doing is setting up a high expectation level for that deed or act you just performed. For instance, you are being nice and help someone out of your way on the train – and that person in return does not show his thankfulness or takes you for granted. How do you feel?

The first thing that comes to our mind is that, “at least, he/she could have said “thanks!”, instead he /she just ignored me”. If in this situation we were to make our minds neutral, we would not have that expectation, we would not have thought of anything when that help was rendered. We must learn to stay neutral first.

In other words, learning to please everyone and then trying to be neutral is the most hardest thing to do. Instead, if you compose yourself to be neutral, train yourself to lose yourself from expectations, wash yourself of yourself as Rumi says – then you do not have to try to help anyone. It just becomes the natural you. You do not have to try at all. People would start to see you as a person of utmost empathy, caring for every single soul beyond yourself and that is what we all need to aspire for.

The true you

DSC_0036I come to you without me, come to me without you.~Rumi

When is the time you can be without you? To understand this – we must go deeper into what really constitutes you? The true nature of every individual being is goodness. By original nature, we are pure and not clouded. True innocence beholds the minute we go deeper into ourselves. How can we go to the original “you”?

When we start shedding our falseness, true nature beholds.

When we grow up and the so called process of maturing ourselves, we do not realise that we are only adding layers of so called knowledge, societal norms, rules that govern us, to-do’s, cannot-do’s and so much more. We tend to become absolved into these thinking that this is the true nature we are supposed to be. We have in this process, forgotten our innocence. We are reminded time and again by our children and children around us – we refuse to see it, only belittling it by saying that this “kiddish”. By the time we start seeing how our true nature is covered layer by layer with these growing up falsities, we are already too deep in them.

The time is now to start stripping our false covers one by one. This is not an easy one – as we have fallen in love with our new corrupt “you” – it’s hard to let go. There are so many things which binds us. We have to start stripping slowly but steadily -with conviction that this is not me and this must go. This takes time, as we have so many covers till we reach the true “you”. When we reach there, nothing else matters – because we would already be in bliss.

If we can practice this in our relationships, there is no expectations – when you are the real you, where is the question of even expecting.

Energies in a troubled world

DSC_0051“Walk patiently through this troubled world and you will find great treasure. Even though your house may be small, look within it” – Rumi

How is it possible that some human being, or an occasion caused by a human being, can suck your energies in an instant? It’s such a feeling that you are left totally drained by it. It is also amazing to realise only humans can do to each other most of the time, and they do it to other creatures around them without even realising they are doing it. It’s an amazing troubled world.

When we start looking deeper into this energy-draining-humans and instances, one thing is evident. The more you are attached to the person, instance or the thought – the more you feel the energy drains. It might be that the actual drain is less, but your body feels it more. The feelings take over the body – you are hurt more than you actually are.

Detachment is the solution. Easier said than done. When you start getting detached from the circumstances, the person or the thought – energies stay with you. It is strange.

The more detached you are, the more attached the energies are to you.

This is the trick. When you want your energies, start detaching from the world around you. The world is a chaotic troubled place. The energies help to find the world within you. That is a fascinating world. The physical, material world around you is impermanent and ridden with troubles. Let’s forget that – let’s try to save the energies you have everyday to find the world within you. This is what I infer from Rumi today.

Om Shanti!

Detachment as an attachment

IMG_0673“Oh beloved, take away what I want, take away what I do, take away what I need, take away everything that takes me away from you” – Rumi

What takes us away from something which is actually close to the “original” us? How do you define it and can you actually ‘see’ it? and strangely enough those are the things which really binds us. What are those?

Attachments. We are attached to so many things in our day to day lives. From cellphones to books, from food to clothing, from cars to emotions and from hearts to souls. We are all attached to something or the other. Many of these attachments are simple enough for us to stay away from them, albeit even for a short while. Those attachments are a reminder that we can actually do without any attachments. Unless we watch out carefully, attachments are the ones which turn to addictions. Then it becomes much harder to pull away from them.

Attachments are an illusion, Detachment is real.

When you look at detachments, they are strangely more real than being attached. When you can detach from something which you like, you feel better over a very short period of time. When someone stops an addiction, even like smoking – strangely it feels so good even over a short period of time. That’s the secret behind detaching. As attachments are an illusion, they feel real most of the time. It is so hard to phantom living without them. But once if you consciously look at those attachments, then they do not make sense. If they are real, they will make sense and you will be convinced. The more you are able to “look” at them, the easily you will realise, you can do without them.

Like for any detachment, initially there is false pain which is purely because of losing the false pride, there is false anger which is the result of losing the false bond and there is definitely false energy drain which is the result of losing the false love. When you start watching these, then detachment feels real.

We are trained to think that detachment is bad, because it gives the above symptoms and we are not able to bear them. Only when we are able to look above this, then we are able to see the bliss. That is the simple reason why detachment is real.

Like Rumi says, we must be able to offer our attachments consciously to be able to move closer to the ones which are real.

Letting go is the real start

IMG_0310

Wash yourself of yourself,
a white flower blooms in the quietness – Rumi

I think the whole realisation is about being conscious. Being aware. This is ironic, because when we are awake, we are supposed to be aware of what is going around us. But there is a world of difference between being awake and being aware. When you are aware, you are able to feel everything. Every sound is heard, every breath is watched, every thought is felt, every grain of food is tasted and so on.

Awareness leads to realisation.

Only when you are aware, you are able to see the true meaning of attachments and detachments. When you have to wash yourself of yourself, you can only do it in true awareness – and consciously letting go. When you are able to be totally aware, you have to watch everything around you, that is when you are truly living in the present. This is absolutely the real power of now. Living in the now, is what we are meant to achieve and the way to do it is being in the awareness and letting go.

When can you really let go? Once you are able to see what attachments are, what detachments are and you are able to see it in the state of awareness – meaning if you are able to go beyond these feelings and emotions and see it as a neutral person – that is when true letting go can happen. Even if there is a slight emotion, a slight attachment and if you are not aware, letting go becomes painful. When you can truly let go, then you will see the flower of realisation blooms so peacefully within you. This is what we all strive for. This is what we are supposed to be doing. Let go!