To fit inside everyone’s heart , I put on a new face everyday.~Rumi
This pretty much sums up our modern life. We all now have a deep desire to satisfy everyone around us. We want to appear as the do-gooder to even an unknown person. It could be someone whom we just met, or someone with whom we know a possibility of meeting does not exist. Still, we go that very long extra mile to be in that person’s heart.
Here is the thin line.
A need to fit into everyone’s heart is very different from being neutral.
As we endeavour to be in the good books of everyone, be the nicest person they know of or simply exude the demeanour of a humble person – makes you skew towards one thought or the other. You have to change your ways and means to suit to someone’s expectation. In return, what you end up doing is setting up a high expectation level for that deed or act you just performed. For instance, you are being nice and help someone out of your way on the train – and that person in return does not show his thankfulness or takes you for granted. How do you feel?
The first thing that comes to our mind is that, “at least, he/she could have said “thanks!”, instead he /she just ignored me”. If in this situation we were to make our minds neutral, we would not have that expectation, we would not have thought of anything when that help was rendered. We must learn to stay neutral first.
In other words, learning to please everyone and then trying to be neutral is the most hardest thing to do. Instead, if you compose yourself to be neutral, train yourself to lose yourself from expectations, wash yourself of yourself as Rumi says – then you do not have to try to help anyone. It just becomes the natural you. You do not have to try at all. People would start to see you as a person of utmost empathy, caring for every single soul beyond yourself and that is what we all need to aspire for.