True Love

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Love is nothing other than finding the truth. ~Rumi

(I am choosing to take two paths to understand the line, the first is about seeing the truth being painful, second will be truth being bliss!, so two posts on this!)

We are ridden by the present world, where to keep love – we have to cover up. We have to keep ourselves from what we like just to survive the love we know of. Deceit is the new name for love, anger its companion, cheat its accomplice. We hanker to find the new solace, knowing well that even if that was the truth, we have to hide it to keep what we have going. We individually have lost the sense and love to accept nature, accept what we know as truth and transcend our love beyond that. It has also become the norm that we do not want to know the truth, as to accept the truth we have to go beyond being possessive. Possessiveness is the root killer of true love. The more we hold on to what we love, the more we suffocate and the more we want to mask the truth. The classic case of deceit happens only when we hold on to the ones we love beyond what that love can even bear. Truth many times hurts, hurts bad. Like we spoke earlier finding the truth is also a great way to let our ego die sooner. How many of us can take that truth and move our love beyond?

Growing our love even after realising truth might hurt is real unconditional love.

Someone had said earlier, “If you really love something, let it go. If it comes back to you – it truly belonged to you, else not”. When we see our loved one liking someone or something else more than they do to us, we cannot accept it. We want to hold on tightly to that person, so that they won’t leave us. We grow more and more possessive and become ridden with suspicion. We cannot bear the thought of that person leaving us because the truth is that we are insecure. We are scared of loneliness, being left out and dumped. That is more forceful than the actual love we share for that person. On the other hand if we help that person explore their freedom, be unconditional and still share your feelings – no matter whether that person chooses to stay with you or leave – your love does not die. You end up growing your love. Knowing the true love is all about letting go, accept what comes as real even if its not pleasant and love unconditionally. It is a great feeling!

Hurts turn to blessing

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What hurts you, blesses you. Darkness is your candle ~ Rumi

What hurts you? have you sat down and thought what are the list of things that really hurts you? When we sit and think through most of the things that hurt us, we realise that everything is related to our ego. Whatever can hurt us can only touch the ego which covers us. We get hurt by words, thoughts, actions, negativity, feelings and much more – all of which can only touch our ego. Whenever our ego gets touched, it is where anger originates. We have blended so much with our ego, that we are no longer able to see us different from the ego. We feel as if we have gotten really hurt whereas only our ego was touched. If we are able to see us different from the ego and sense that ego is just a cover to our true self, what can really hurt us? Our pure self is really beneath our false ego, and we must realise that our true self can never be touched by anything that only hurts our ego.

Remove the ego, everything you then receive is just a blessing.

When we truly realise that only ego is getting affected, what a true liberation it would be if we in turn want to get the ego to be affected, battered and ego get hurt, so that it leaves us? it gets killed? that is liberating. If you see any hurt then you will start to welcome it, knowing very well it is going to help kill the ego. The more ego gets battered, the more it would distance itself from you, the true self. In that nature of hurt lies a great blessing which you must learn to welcome. The minute we are able to distance ourself from our ego, bliss originates. Anger has no place, as anger is only connected to the ego. When ego goes, so does your anger. It has no residence in you. The more purer you get, the more bliss you are in. In that sense, darkness of letting your ego go, is definitely your candle. That candle then illuminates your self, which would then light everything around you. Lets hanker for that true light to emanate from us.

Energies in a troubled world

DSC_0051“Walk patiently through this troubled world and you will find great treasure. Even though your house may be small, look within it” – Rumi

How is it possible that some human being, or an occasion caused by a human being, can suck your energies in an instant? It’s such a feeling that you are left totally drained by it. It is also amazing to realise only humans can do to each other most of the time, and they do it to other creatures around them without even realising they are doing it. It’s an amazing troubled world.

When we start looking deeper into this energy-draining-humans and instances, one thing is evident. The more you are attached to the person, instance or the thought – the more you feel the energy drains. It might be that the actual drain is less, but your body feels it more. The feelings take over the body – you are hurt more than you actually are.

Detachment is the solution. Easier said than done. When you start getting detached from the circumstances, the person or the thought – energies stay with you. It is strange.

The more detached you are, the more attached the energies are to you.

This is the trick. When you want your energies, start detaching from the world around you. The world is a chaotic troubled place. The energies help to find the world within you. That is a fascinating world. The physical, material world around you is impermanent and ridden with troubles. Let’s forget that – let’s try to save the energies you have everyday to find the world within you. This is what I infer from Rumi today.

Om Shanti!

Detachment as an attachment

IMG_0673“Oh beloved, take away what I want, take away what I do, take away what I need, take away everything that takes me away from you” – Rumi

What takes us away from something which is actually close to the “original” us? How do you define it and can you actually ‘see’ it? and strangely enough those are the things which really binds us. What are those?

Attachments. We are attached to so many things in our day to day lives. From cellphones to books, from food to clothing, from cars to emotions and from hearts to souls. We are all attached to something or the other. Many of these attachments are simple enough for us to stay away from them, albeit even for a short while. Those attachments are a reminder that we can actually do without any attachments. Unless we watch out carefully, attachments are the ones which turn to addictions. Then it becomes much harder to pull away from them.

Attachments are an illusion, Detachment is real.

When you look at detachments, they are strangely more real than being attached. When you can detach from something which you like, you feel better over a very short period of time. When someone stops an addiction, even like smoking – strangely it feels so good even over a short period of time. That’s the secret behind detaching. As attachments are an illusion, they feel real most of the time. It is so hard to phantom living without them. But once if you consciously look at those attachments, then they do not make sense. If they are real, they will make sense and you will be convinced. The more you are able to “look” at them, the easily you will realise, you can do without them.

Like for any detachment, initially there is false pain which is purely because of losing the false pride, there is false anger which is the result of losing the false bond and there is definitely false energy drain which is the result of losing the false love. When you start watching these, then detachment feels real.

We are trained to think that detachment is bad, because it gives the above symptoms and we are not able to bear them. Only when we are able to look above this, then we are able to see the bliss. That is the simple reason why detachment is real.

Like Rumi says, we must be able to offer our attachments consciously to be able to move closer to the ones which are real.

Letting go is the real start

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Wash yourself of yourself,
a white flower blooms in the quietness – Rumi

I think the whole realisation is about being conscious. Being aware. This is ironic, because when we are awake, we are supposed to be aware of what is going around us. But there is a world of difference between being awake and being aware. When you are aware, you are able to feel everything. Every sound is heard, every breath is watched, every thought is felt, every grain of food is tasted and so on.

Awareness leads to realisation.

Only when you are aware, you are able to see the true meaning of attachments and detachments. When you have to wash yourself of yourself, you can only do it in true awareness – and consciously letting go. When you are able to be totally aware, you have to watch everything around you, that is when you are truly living in the present. This is absolutely the real power of now. Living in the now, is what we are meant to achieve and the way to do it is being in the awareness and letting go.

When can you really let go? Once you are able to see what attachments are, what detachments are and you are able to see it in the state of awareness – meaning if you are able to go beyond these feelings and emotions and see it as a neutral person – that is when true letting go can happen. Even if there is a slight emotion, a slight attachment and if you are not aware, letting go becomes painful. When you can truly let go, then you will see the flower of realisation blooms so peacefully within you. This is what we all strive for. This is what we are supposed to be doing. Let go!